Archive for positive parenting

God’s Shield and a Heart of Compassion

Psalm 86:15
“But you, Lord, are a compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness.”

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Developing a Proactive vs Reactive Mindset

Proverbs 14:22-24 (NIV)

Do not those who plot evil go astray?
But those who plan what is good find love and faithfulness.

All hard work brings a profit,
but mere talk leads only to poverty.

The wealth of the wise is their crown,
but the folly of fools yields folly.

Our already busy lives have been complicated by the Covid pandemic which increased either our frustration or fear. As we live with uncertainty, worry, fear and frustration move us toward a more reactive mindset. This could explain why people are less friendly and more easily agitated which has led to the increase in suicide, divorce and domestic violence that we are experiencing in our society today. Read More →

What Makes Great Faith-Based Parents? (pt 2)

Escaping Pressure and Expectations as Parents

Great faith-based parents are able to Escape Pressure and Expectations.

This may be counter to what we have heard or believe. We have been told that high expectations lead to higher achievement.

Is this true when living under pressure and a list of expectations increases stress, decreases patience, and often leads to internal negativity? Pressure and Expectations can flow from within or be placed on us externally. When we face significant pressure from within we tend to be hard on ourselves and often end up feeling like we are consistently falling short. We may feel or believe we are either not good enough or even a failure. These deeply held internal feelings/beliefs cause us to be defensive, driven, or even withdrawn depending on the situation and our personalities. Any of these may lead to challenges in either our relationships or jobs.

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Focus on Progress Rather Than Destination! (pt 1)

Over 1,000 families signed up for our Influential Parenting Academy in just over four weeks. As a result I have been receiving more phone calls from parents related to their kids. Many of these calls come from parents who have finished the class and are about to begin the implementation process or have taken the first few steps of the implementation process. Read More →

Parenting with Love (pt 1)

A rare voice from Heaven

Only twice in the New Testament does God the Father speak audibly to mankind; once at the baptism of Jesus and secondly on a mountain when Jesus was revealed in glory to Peter, James and John. All of the first 3 gospels record the events. Not to be disrespectful in any way, but I can’t help but picture the Father up there looking down, placing his thumbs behind His lapels, puffing out His chest and saying, “Datsa my Boy!” (I think that’s in an Italian translation!). And in each case he calls Jesus “my beloved son”. How do you think Jesus felt on hearing that? And could there be a more joyful, affirming sound to a son or daughter than hearing his or her father bragging about his love for them?

In this series we will delve into the most important topic, Love. When we are feeling loved we feel special, content and happy. When we are feeling rejected, we feel hurt, angry and withdrawn. Keeping a sense of love alive between family members is challenging given our pace of life. Activities and commitments pull us apart and create pressure on both parents and kids. Read More →

Essential T’s of Family Connection: Talk (pt 3)

One of the three pillars that lead from Trust to Togetherness:

One of the keys for family connection that builds a sense of togetherness is TALK, simple on its face, but complex in its execution. Our challenge as parents and grandparents is establishing a culture of communication that builds and encourages open communication and togetherness.  We desire to be together but pools of pain within, unsolved issues, and poor communication habits can rob us of what we truly desire. Read More →

What to ask your six to eighteen year olds?

How to Develop Emotional Communication to Help Your Six to Eighteen-Year-Old

When our children reach adolescence, as a result of the changes occurring within their brain development, they become more emotional.  Children age 9 to 18 become more sensitive to the things we say and do. This is the reason I recommend that parents begin to ask emotionally focused questions with their children beginning as early as age six. This helps to establish communication before brain development begins to change. Read More →

Empowering Patience Today

Welcome back, we’re picking backup on our series, Discovering our Patience after taking a break to talk about Corona, Fear and Our Kids.  

Over the last couple of weeks we’ve talked about triggers and rounding our personality type. I can’t understate how important it is to tackle our triggers for our lives, relationships and families.  Addressing them will bring freedom; we won’t have to be self-controlled all the time, which is really exhausting. If you missed these blogs I encourage you to go back and read them.

Short Circuit Reactions Today

Meanwhile you may need some things to do that will help short circuit reactions.  This is why we are discussing how we Empower our patients today. I found a good article in my research entitled: 10 Tips for Becoming a More Patient Parent. It had a number of tips we can  implement today with our kids.  Read More →

Fear and Our Kids

Welcome back to revive families connecting hearts blog. We’ve been in the midst of a series on patience. Given everything going on with the Coronavirus and the fear I see growing, I thought it might be a great time to stop and take a short break from the patience series and talk a little bit about fear and our kids. 

There are many reasons to be fearful and or worry today as may States like California are ordering shelter in place restrictions and businesses to be shut down. There is fear of the virus but also fears about jobs and the economy.  All of these are legitimate concerns, but questions arise; how do we deal with our fears and how do we handle them with our kids? Read More →

Patience is so important for our lives and health.  It will impact the quality of our relationships and the culture of our families. This week we’re exploring how patience and personality type interacts with each other. 

In our first week we looked at research that proves that it’s the relationship we have with our kids that actually protects them, not the way we approach them or our boundaries and consequences. Second we revealed that Impatience is on our side of the ledger. It’s not a result of our kid’s behavior. Finally we explored why the root of impatience is selfishness. Impatience comes when our goals and objectives are impeded or they’re not happening in a timely manner.

In week two we talked about Patience and Triggers. Triggers are really important to understand because they override our best intentions and self control. When we trigger, we will overreact. We looked at self awareness strategies that help us head triggers off at the pass. Then we discussed deeper healing so we are not constantly expending energy trying to catch ourselves.

As we think about patience and our personalities, we need to recognize that some personality types will naturally exhibit more patience than others. If you’re like me and find yourself on the other side of the equation, that’s ok. We’re going to explore why and what we can do to alter the focus and priorities to help us understand and become more patient moms and dads.

I throw myself into this for a reason.  Patience was difficult for me given my natural personality.  It took a concerted effort to become a more patient, compassionate person.  As a result, I now see patience and compassion being tied together.  When we have little compassion for others feelings, we tend to have less patience with them.   Read More →

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