Archive for Resolving Issues

Essential T’s of Family Connection (pt 1)

In the Book of Deuteronomy in the Bible God tells Moses “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” Deut. 6:5-7

Clearly God shares the importance of His instruction, but this exhortation also pictures a family where conversation and closeness occur. In verses 20 and 21 God says, “When your son asks you in time to come, What is the meaning of the testimonies and the statutes and the rules that the Lord our God has commanded you? Then you shall say …” Equally clear, then, is that curious questioning and trusted instruction are involved. Implied in these verses is that the family is to be a place where relationship is of utmost importance, both with God and with one another. Read More →

Prior to my journey of heart healing I had intellectually forgiven the sources of the stuffed issues and pain within me.  Yet without having turned and dealt with the harm within, it was not a full forgiveness. As the negative beliefs I had adopted came to the forefront and the sources of those beliefs were identified, it was clear that my forgiveness was incomplete.

I had to truly begin to heal within before I could truly forgive in such a manner that I did not seek to guard and protect myself from those I had intellectually forgiven.  Read More →

Given that our culture is not a culture of grieving it seems only natural that we would learn to stuff our feelings only to reach a point where our hearts shut down because of unresolved issues with our parents, others or things outside our control which lead to the amount of pain we carry inside. Read More →

Even in Seemingly Good Times, Our Kids Struggle

Recently I worked with a family that was by all measures successful and yet their kids were struggling.  They lived in a great area, had plenty of resources and the kids enjoyed more activities and opportunities than their parents had.

Given this reality it was hard for the parents to understand why both their kids struggled in significant ways.  One struggled with depression and anxiety, while the other had motivation issues with school and a significant anger issue.

This amazing couple could not understand why their kids would not or could not be grateful for their situation, take advantage of the opportunities and move forward confidently.  After all, to them, their kids were treated better than they were when they were kids and they had so much more to be appreciative of. Read More →

In the midst of this unprecedented time in our country, parents are having to deal with kids being at home more than ever. When we have adolescents, that can present some challenges, which is why I decided to do the series 9 Insights Parents Need to Know When They are Raising Adolescents.
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Patience is so important for our lives and health.  It will impact the quality of our relationships and the culture of our families. This week we’re exploring how patience and personality type interacts with each other. 

In our first week we looked at research that proves that it’s the relationship we have with our kids that actually protects them, not the way we approach them or our boundaries and consequences. Second we revealed that Impatience is on our side of the ledger. It’s not a result of our kid’s behavior. Finally we explored why the root of impatience is selfishness. Impatience comes when our goals and objectives are impeded or they’re not happening in a timely manner.

In week two we talked about Patience and Triggers. Triggers are really important to understand because they override our best intentions and self control. When we trigger, we will overreact. We looked at self awareness strategies that help us head triggers off at the pass. Then we discussed deeper healing so we are not constantly expending energy trying to catch ourselves.

As we think about patience and our personalities, we need to recognize that some personality types will naturally exhibit more patience than others. If you’re like me and find yourself on the other side of the equation, that’s ok. We’re going to explore why and what we can do to alter the focus and priorities to help us understand and become more patient moms and dads.

I throw myself into this for a reason.  Patience was difficult for me given my natural personality.  It took a concerted effort to become a more patient, compassionate person.  As a result, I now see patience and compassion being tied together.  When we have little compassion for others feelings, we tend to have less patience with them.   Read More →

Lessons from a Technology Outage: A Technology Fast

There is no question technology makes things easier and faster, when it’s working… but does it make life better?  What would happen if we lost all cell and internet service? Read More →

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